Far East Cynic

There is a line in the movie…..

Yes there is a line in every great movie that would apply to today:

“Sometimes you can just smell a shitty day coming down the pike”-The Paper, Michael Keaton.

“Well let me tell you guys, its a cold world out there and tomorrow we are all going back into it!” -The Big Chill, William Hurt.

“Here’s to you……sucking my..d***………..” Ford Fairlane, Andrew Dice Clay.

Can you tell today sucked? It did, trust me. It started off bad when the boneheads in Bahrain did not do what they were directed to do , then had the unmitigated gall to not own up to their mistake. Not realizing they would get caught on the cargo delivered report and the output report from the terminal, they tried to lie their way out of it. Of course that led to a heartfelt, “What the fuck is going on out there with those guys!?!?” from my boss. That in turn led to a subsequent, ” Get your ass out there and find out what’s going on!” from my boss. Accordingly, I will now be on my way out to hell Bahrain to try to get to the bottom of a mess that never should have occurred. If I were still military, I could just shoot them all, now I have to try to convince them not be so fucked up……….GRRRR.

So on Friday, I’m out of here. One night in Hong Kong trying to buy Spike a beer, or at least meet his recommendations. After that 6 days in hell trying to unf**k the things these boneheads should have known how to do, or could have at least asked how to do. THANKS GUYS! Thanks for nothing! At least I get a night in Hong Kong that I was not counting on. Lan Kwai Fung here I come!

Amazing.

I don’t mind going to Bahrain so much because I get to go to Hong Kong enroute, but I just wish I had more notice. Now I’ll be trying to play pick up football and also trying to stop the bleeding from our activities , who by the way still do not realize how badly they f**ked up. Call the guys in Horn of Africa and ask em….you might not like the answer..” you d**kheads!

On other more pleasant notes today I was able to get a very concise history lesson about Korea from Hemlock, turns out Asian history is still complex:

To take his mind off it, Odell asks me a simple but profound question. Koreans,? What the fuck? I give him the country’s history in a nutshell. First, it was repeatedly invaded by the Japanese, then it was repeatedly invaded by the Mongols, then it was repeatedly invaded by the Chinese, then it was repeatedly invaded by the Manchus, then it got one big, maybe-they’ll-get-the-message-this-time invasion from the Japanese again, and in 1950 it invaded itself. This experience, I explain, has made these people the proud and noble mouth-frothing xenophobes we all know and love today, threatening to send hordes of vicious peasant warriors to Hong Kong if our Government does not honour their birthright as sons of the Hermit Kingdom, namely immunity from laws against assaulting policewomen with bamboo poles. Odell thinks about it. Maybe its the other way around, he suggests. Maybe they kept on getting invaded because they’re assholes.

Whatever. Korea still does not provide the requiste “nookie” opportunities I need!

And then there is the whole cloning thing!

I’m scared!!!