Far East Cynic

More Friday Afternoon Buffoonery…….

Definition of Buffoon:

1. A clown; a jester: a court buffoon.
2. A person given to clowning and joking.
3. A ludicrous or bumbling person; a fool.
4. Skippy-san’s ex wife

Speaking of my ex, Keiko-san moved on and just like my ex left destruction in her wake:

Japundit has found a product that had Michael Jackson but known about it, could have saved him a fortune in legal fees…( and no jail time.) :

“At Doll no mori (forest of dolls ??????you can fulfill your dreams in the privacy of your own home or hotel room with a life-size doll. These high-quality dolls are made of silicon and reportedly cost about 500,000 yen each(5000 US$). This being Japan, the
dolls are equipped with faces that make them look about 12 years old, and one
even looks like something straight out of some manga. Optional outfits include
school girl, nurse, underwear, maid, gym wear, baby doll pajamas, and more. The
dolls are not for sale but for rent.
After paying 2,000 yen to become a member, you can rent dolls at rates that range from 13,000 yen($125) for 70 minutes, to 45,000 yen(450$) for a full 24 hours. You also have to pay for the doll’s transportation costs. According to the Doll No Mori website, any of the following constitutes damage to the doll, and will be charged extra:
Fingernail marks, bite marks, and cuts made with a knife or other bladed instrument
Burn marks
Liquid other than lotion
Excessive bending of the doll’s joints
Dirty or torn clothing
A dirty head
Semen anywhere other than the “special hole” (Be sure to use a condom!)”

There are some really sick people out there (and Michael Jackson is definitely one of them!). Me, I’ll stick to getting slapped in the face, one (real and over 21 years old) woman at a time!

In other news, there is a reason why the DPRK has problems getting ahead in the world( Besides being ruled by a pathetic, communist, little psycho-path), they can’t write a good song! Take a look at this catchy little number from Korea of Songun: A Poem in 17 Stanzas:

V. Ideological Confrontation and Deterrent Force

Sea of Fire! Hail the enemy’s licking its wounds.
Hear that Bush “loathes” Kim Jong Il, and
that is a bad thing, why?
Why does Bush loathe Kim Jong Il?
Because he knows that the DPRK of Songun, can never be controlled.

The DPRK goes its own way.
Our dear Leader is not a puppet on a leash.
Rather, he is our symbol of dignity.
Marshal Kim Jong Il is our guiding light of destiny!

Catchy tune isn’t it? ….NOT!

Meanwhile, in the push to privatize Japan’s postal system, the government of Prime Minister Koizumi is pulling out all the stops:

Lifts and separates, as well as delivers the mail!

Meanwhile over at Geezers corner, bothenook takes us on a trip down memory lane. Everybody should link to him because he’s really trying hard to get his wings! Nice mustache! Like Mike said, “I don’t mind pimping for other bloggers that deserve it.”

Sleek Black Mercedes offers yet another argument in favor of the Ladder Theory. He offers an interesting perspective on why men cheat. And why they buy strange tooth brushes:

Meanwhile, Pope Palpatine, er I mean Benedict XVI, has given the beer industry in Germany a shot in the arm:

VATICAN — You might think the new pope would prefer water or wine, but Pope Benedict XVI has given the thumbs up to beer. Thanks to the pope, a German brewery is enjoying new success thanks to his endorsement.
A Stuttgart brewery had been struggling to sell its wheat beer, until pictures showed then -Cardinal Ratzinger enjoying the brew every once in a while. So when the new pope was elected, white smoke not only emerged from the Sistine Chapel, but from the brewery’s chimney as well.
This past weekend, the brewery sent a beer truck to Rome delivering 185 gallons of beer to the pope

Lastly here’s a poster that pretty accurately sums up my life lately:

Time for a beer!