“Secretary of the Navy Donald C. Winter announced today the selection of USS Gerald R. Ford as the name of the first aircraft carrier in what will be the Gerald R. Ford class of carriers.”
Ford class of carriers? Oh boy…..
I can hear the jokes now:
Buy a Ford and you buy the best. Drive the first mile and walk the rest.
Tom: My parents just bought me a Ford Mustang.
Jim: So what did you do to them to tick them off?
Do you know that Ford has admitted they are expensive and unreliable? That new commercial they are running says so! When that country singer says “If I had me some money” he admits he can’t afford one, and when he adds that he’d “buy a Ford truck or two” it because he needs a spare.
A Texan was talking big in a bar one night about how much money he had,how many women he had been with and how much land he owned. A young man, growing tired of all the big talk finally asked the Texan, “Just how much land do you actually own”? The Texan tipped back his cowboy hat and said to the young man ” Well sonny let me put it to ya like this, I can get in my pickup at sunrise, drive all day long,skip lunch and still not get to the other side of my property by sundown”. The young man shot back quickly, ” Oh yeah, I know what you mean, I used to own a Ford truck too”!
WHAT DID THE CHEVY SAY TO THE FORD?
Would you like a tow home?
FORD ACRONYMS:
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found On Road Dead
Backwards… Driver Returns On Foot
Backwards… Dorks Ride On Fords
Factory Ordered Road Disaster
Factory Ordered Rebuilt Dodge(Datsun)
Flip Over Read Directions
Four Old Rusted Doors
Fixed On Race Day
Ford Owner Really Dumb
For Only Retarded Drivers
Ford Owners Recommend Dodge
Flipped Over Russian Dunebuggy
Found On Russian Dump
For Off Road Death
it Freaking Only Runs Downhill
Fat Old Rusted Dog
Freaking Old Rusted Dodge(Datsun)
Frigin Oakies Really Dig it
Funky Old Road Dog
Found On Roadside’s Destroyed
Backwards…Don’t Ride Over Fifty
Fixed-up Old Repossesed Dodge
Found Old Rebuilt Dodge
Forget Out Running Dale
Found On Railroad Deserted
Found On Railroad Dead
Fools Only Read Directions
First On Repair Dolly
Favorite Of Redneck Drivers
Backwards- Dumb Retards Own Fords
Funny Old Rebuilt Dodge
Fast Only Rolling Downhill
Found On Russian Dump
Forfiet On Race Day
Found On River Dead
Failure Of Research & Development
The Navy thought the acronym BOHICA was bad-wait till Sailors get a hold of this. There’s some real money to be made in T-shirts and bumper stickers!
